Limbo

Wednesday morning, T-minus 12 hours until I'm whisked off into Limbo, a place where time and space cease to exist. I expect Gary Coleman to guide me through a history of the world while clocks fly past me with the hands spinning the wrong way, and I'll ask him why the effect of time stops working on black child actors of failed 'cross-over' sitcoms from the 80's and he'll simply shrug his shoulders, and then I'll ask him where I can get a beer in this crazy place and he'll ask me for ID and only then will I be enlightened. And when I wake up, it won't be Christmas, and I'll learn that Christmas doesn't even exist, but somehow I am living in the future, because it's Friday morning when it should be Thursday, and all you New Yorkers will be standing upside down.

...Unfortunately Limbo coincides with a best friend's birthday so as a birthday present, Ken, just imagine me among a sea of Asians with a very confused look on my face...happy birthday, brotha.