What Happened To Devon's Eye?

a) in the spirit of july 4th, his blood boldly declared independence from the tyranny of his face.

b) strapped for cash, he agreed to do a facial for the women's porn site menstrualbukkake.com.

c) his queer eye for queer guys ruptured instantly upon seeing the hordes of shirtless homos at fire island.*

d) terrorism. fucking terrorism happened to his eye. 704. never forget.

e) reenactment of that classic moment in the american revolution when sam adams chucked an empty 22 oz. at his buddy paul revere who tried catching it with his eye.


*which would explain why he's so happy


i'll post the whole story sometime after i write it and before you read it. in the meantime, check out dev's awesome but chronically unupdated blog.

Limited Time Offer

now you too can let everyone know how upset you are that your girlfriend had an abortion. this timeless 100% cotton t-shirt even includes the official franco-vietnamese hospital logo where phuong murdered my unborn child. just leave all your credit card information in the comments section and wait.

also available:

"i fucked a vietnamese prostitute and all i got was this lousy HIV"